Pittsburgh is truly a great little city.As is like me, I am terrified of finding a new place of my own and growing roots or developing a support system or whatever they call it.
Today, with money worries I spent half the day angry at the injustices which landed me here---but I really have to admit that as Elizabeth S. told me, "God can turn S**t into gold" and that he is doing That the family has been exploded everyone left on his own for the sake of two very selfish people's sexual gratification ---even our happy past memories are painful now. Because we are all so sure of no more family gatherings like those--certainly no spontaneity, or a houseful of laughter and friends, no more board games at Christmas, when T-Bob especially astonished and delighted us with his raunchy humor. And how does a person value himself when a parent has chosen to leave the family to follow the urgings of an overactive libido? Some people might not like me being this blunt, but the pink elephant in the living room has remained inconspicuous long enough. I keep tripping on it.
But we are surviving. T-Bob likes my temporary Pittsburgh digs--he likes cities, I think. Nim is working very hard to help me save money for an acutual apartment, Jables encourages whenever he has the time to call. Some days are horrible, but then they pass. For my depression, well, I am surrounded by a great many hospitals, looming like fortresses in the distance when I look at them from my balcony. In one crazy week I went to four different ones (it's complicated).
I don't think you guys out there will ever know how grateful I am for your readership, your empathy, your presence in my life.You are all a gift from God.
